Usually when we hear horror stories about a manager's behavior, we can easily and honestly say, "I'd never do that." But if you, as an organizational leader (or member), are alienating staff members or causing frustration, stress or confusion that keeps others from giving their best to the company, wouldn't you want to know? Unless you're one of those relatively rare Certified Jerks (C.J.), wouldn't you want to do something about it?

Based on both external research and personal experience, here are several typical leader behaviors (as well as a few real doozies) that can irritate the heck out of the people with whom you work. In low-key to moderate cases, Members, and even the leaders, lose time and energy they'd rather spend making the company—and their own job—better. In the mid-range to worst case scenarios, C.J. leader behavior can result in lawsuits, worker's compensation claims, plummeting productivity, and turnover of Members you'd rather keep onboard.

Potentially destructive leader behaviors

Do as I say, not as I do.

One of the things that crops up often in employee surveys is, "He tells us to do one thing, but doesn't walk his own talk." For example, if you're evangelizing about providing great customer service, but nay-say, condescend and remain inaccessible to the very staff that interacts with customers, you're providing a model you probably don't want them to emulate with customers. Make sure your own behavior is in line with your rhetoric. Demonstrate the behavior you want from Members.

Follow the Guru.

If adopting the management theory du jour is routine behavior for you, it could suck the life energy right out of even the most terrific, enthusiastic Members and derail progress toward the Club's goals. In competitive markets and seat-of-the-pants start-up environments, doing what worked last year or even last week isn't usually realistic. But changing strategies without adequate communication, or changing strategies without a centering vision, makes it tough for staff members to want to commit their energy on your (or the club's) behalf.
 

Did I say that?

This is the leader who assigns a project, often with a rush deadline, then casually tells the employee, as she's submitting it as requested, that he no longer needs it. Or assigns the same task to several people without telling any of them that a coworker's also working on it. Or makes promises she conveniently forgets about once the staff member has fulfilled his part of the agreement.

Therapist-Mom (or Dad).

You could easily mistake this leader's domain with group therapy at a psychologist's office, because emotional and dysfunctional behavior rule the day. A wanna-be psycho-therapist, this leader draws no guidelines between personal and professional behavior, so therapeutic personal discussions about or resulting from various dysfunctions flourish. Hugs, encounter sessions and tissue boxes are more abundant than efficiency and professionalism.

Ask, don't act.

This is the leader who asks for feedback or ideas that then seem to fall into a black hole of inaction. Suggestion boxes go unanswered, brainstorm sessions yield no follow-up action, reports get filed and collect dust, and feedback yields no changed behavior. The only things that shift are employee morale and meeting participation levels, which decrease.

Master of equality.

Often seen in small business and entrepreneurial environments, this leader doesn't want anyone to feel left out. He willingly shares information about all aspects of the business, from strategic plans to financial details. He's the leader who says, "I want my Members to care as much about the business as I do" and is disappointed when they don't. Sooner or later, though, he learns the Rules of the Wise Entrepreneur: 1) They who don't pay the bills and carry the risk will never care as much about the business as she who wakes up at 2:00 a.m. worrying.; and 2) even the flattest organizations have some hierarchy because not everyone wants the responsibility of a truly egalitarian environment, and someone has to make the many decisions required in a Club. The buck does, in fact, stop somewhere.

Attila the Hun

 (or Cruella DeVille). Stories abound about men and women who reduce others to tears by screaming, hurling objects, threatening or insulting others. Entire cartoon lines and web sites have sprung forth thanks to such anecdotes. Granted, if a person allows someone treat her this way, she or he shares the responsibility. But some behavior is so unexpected, so curt, even cruel, that it catches one off-guard. Perhaps some leaders get so lost in their own insecurity or intense pressure, they lose sight of how their behavior looks and sounds to others. In the worst cases, C.J. Leaders don't care, until they get a letter from their former member's lawyer, find themselves the subject in a nasty news headline, or lose membership as a result of unhappy Members and a continual revolving door through which the best and brightest eventually escape.

Uber Geek.

This leader doesn't like to be fenced in, and doesn't realize that the people who work for him don't all thrive in environments that have no structure, no policies, no job descriptions, no direction save "making cool software." After all, he's not a Suit, he's a brilliant programmer (or marketer or chef) who wants to build a cool, flat, phat, creative, egalitarian work environment. Pool tables and pinball machines abound. But while Chaos Theory rules, chaotic offices do not.

Temperamentally yours.

This is the leader who thinks consistency relates only to the preferred thickness of his Fruit Smoothie. Members never know quite what to expect from her; she's happy and chatty one minute, sullen or snappish the next. The only thing that's consistent are his mood swings! But hey, it keeps those Members guessing (and stressing). How marvelous!
 

Do you recognize yourself in any of these profiles?

Come on, not even a little bit?

Take heart; acknowledging our Shadow is a first big step. Another good step would be to get an honest assessment of how Members experience working for you. If you'd like to take another toward Enlightened Leadership there are some great sites to be seen we will be listing some of them here.